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06/26/2002 Stupid 'net tricks: Google

Now there's another fascinating and surreal way to waste time: Go to Google and search on the string "[your first name] is" (include the quotes; substitute your actual first name for the bracketed phrase). The results are illuminating, odd, and overall not how you'd probably describe yourself. They are, of course, highly entertaining:

Maurice is a robot developed by Dr. Tony Farquhar of UMBC.
To solve this problem, Maurice is using and reading about extensions to traditional tracking techniques (such as Multiple Hypothesis Tracking).
Maurice is described as "a handsome boy with a heartwarming smile."
Maurice is teaching a combination grade four and five classes in Germany.
Maurice is currently searching for a permanent sponsorship agreement.
The amount of land area in Maurice is 4.351 sq. kilometers.
Maurice is a military man, while Chris is an ex-convict.
Maurice is nowhere to be found!
Maurice is held for contempt of Court.
Maurice is developed and maintained by COMPNet USA-MAURITIUS.
Maurice is, by almost any measure, an exceptional human being.
Maurice is a resort of character, attracting investors from abroad.
Maurice is nevertheless a fascinating piece of work for a number of reasons.
Maurice is often black and almost always a foot soldier.
Maurice is bored with life's sameness.
Maurice is flattered by the attention from Japanese tourists.
Maurice is a remarkable problem creator.
Maurice is truly a self made man and his story is inspiring.
Maurice is a talking cat who leads a band of rather special rats from town to town to fake invasions of vermin.
Maurice is ready to give the white glove test when ever you need him!
Maurice is celebrating x-mas and new year in Indonesia.
Maurice is currently working on a project that few people ever thought would come about.
Maurice is the man for you.
Maurice is all about hard work.
Maurice is too authentic.
Maurice is a firm believer in cardiovascular conditioning.
Maurice is a perfect picture of Mick Jagger & a kind gentleman!
Maurice is heartbroken, and it's so sad...
Maurice is taught to be one of the herd from the time that he is young...
Maurice is the hardest working man in show business.
Maurice is well received in China, partly because of his cousin's connections.
Maurice is better known to most of us lawyers as the Fame Award contestant in the comedian section in 1995.
MAURICE is a five star luxury hotel, overlooking a peaceful lagoon and the coral barrier reef.
Though Maurice is only minimally useful, it is advised that the player keep him around as long as possible to hear his various contributions.
Maurice is located 15 minutes from the airport by helicopter.
Maurice is considered by many to be America's greatest living poet.... Maurice is fond of cappuccino, chocolate croissants, and the color mauve.
Maurice is holding a bag with a few goldfish inside.
Maurice is the most dynamic and clinical sprinter I have ever watched.
Maurice is held in the Society of Genealogists' Library.
Maurice is an expert at disguising his feelings under witty statements full of bitterness.
Maurice is on the phone trying to secure a great violinist.
Maurice is retired from the road but continues to do production work for Earth Wind and Fire and other artists under his record company.
Maurice is in France.
Maurice is heading to Cornell University.
Maurice is an accomplished self-taught animator as well as a gifted writer and cartoonist.
Maurice is a real-time digital effects unit.

Extra points go to anyone who can pick out any that are actually true. (via Chuck Taggart's fine 'blog Looka)

01/11/2001 search requests: effect of music listening in restaurants

Another great search request! Someone came to my Music Listening page with a search on effect of music listening in restaurants.

I dunno, what do you think the effect is? It can't be good. And whatever it is I say about it, Netscape doesn't want you to know it anymore--my site didn't turn up when I tried that URL. Music listening in restaurants? I think it's a scourge.

12/09/2000 search requests: petroleum byproducts

Cool! A look at my logs shows that my Music Production page is the fifth result in the search for petroleum byproducts!

This is even better than my Music Listening Archive turning up in a search for list of actresses who had fender benders--just what was this guy (it had to be a guy) looking for? Is this like a minor-league version of Crash or something?

12/05/2000 links to me: techno geek

While I'm unsure exactly why I was singled out for this particular honor, someone calling themselves The Mission Statement is linking to me as a "Techno Geek." Well, okay. I have been letting my geek flag fly lately, I guess.

08/07/2000 links to me

Well whaddya know. Here's a link to me. Thanks, Mike! It looks like he's still working on his site at the moment, but it's still a nice list of links to be in.

05/13/1998 Interrobang

A page devoted to one of my favorite typographic characters, the Interrobang.